Change is an inevitable and constant part of our lives. Yet many of us resist change or are not psychologically ready to allow change to happen. Our relationships, work, personal life decisions and many others weeks can become stagnant because of this lack of readiness towards change. Many times we aren’t even sure whether the change that we are making is a positive one or a negative one. But attempting to evolve, to allow change is many times better that remaining stuck or stagnating in one place.
Change is a vague and abstract terminology, and change may look different for different people at different times in their lives. For instance, for some people, change may be to take risks, for some, it may be to start believing in their capabilities, for some it may be to push themselves to do certain things,
for some change may be to reach for help,
for some it may be to slow down and allow one to rest or relax. Whatever change means to you, can vary at different times in different phases of your life. However, it is important to identify the signs that you are ready to make or allow the change and that you are ready to leave your comfort zone. Here are some common signs that you are ready for change:
- You feel ready to give up some part of your story that is not working anymore
We all have our own narrative about who we are, what we want and what defines us. The trick to a healthy mind is to be flexible with our narrative, our story and not let it run the show, especially when life situations do not adhere to this story. For eg. If I see myself as a person who never gives up, I will have a hard time accepting the end of a relationship or a path in my work life. So overtime, you may feel that you want some part of your story to end or that it’s not working for you anymore.
- You keep feeling emotionally disturbed or anxious
Repetitive emotional disturbance, anxiety, feeling low or upset are signs that you are ready to welcome change into your life. Your body and mind are both signaling through these emotions that you need to make changes to the way you live your life. For eg. Loneliness is a sign that you need to form more meaningful connections, anger is a sign that you need to process certain needs and accept things that are beyond your control, sadness is a sign that some behaviors need to be modified in order to live a more physically and mentally healthy life. Listen to the messages behind these emotions, understand the baggage that you may be carrying and get support if you need to.
- You feel disconnected from people around you
Our relationship with others is a reflection of our relationship with ourselves. The more disconnected we are with our self, the more we will feel that with others. The more acceptance and love we have towards ourselves, the more we will experience love and acceptance for others regardless of whether or not they fit in our moulds of a good friend, colleague, partner, family member. The disconnect may also be a sign that u don’t feel like fitting into your own role that you have created in those relationships. Either way, you are ready for change and that shows in your social interactions.
- You feel like you are on the brink of something new
You may feel as if you are on the edge of a precipice or about to encounter something different in your life. It may feel like an impending sense that something new is about to happen. Many times your unconscious is already preparing for the change and it may signify you in simple and subtle ways. Whether you go through with it or not may still be a conscious decision.
- You don’t identify with behaviors or thoughts from your recent past anymore
You may feel disidentified with certain things you did, said, thought or felt from the recent past. Certain events may be feel more alien. This happens to us when we think of the person we were years ago. But it may also happen if we are ready to change and don’t connect to the ideas and beliefs that we held very dear to us. It is natural to feel this when they don’t support us or our reality anymore. Remember that you have to allow yourself to evolve and that implies that you disidentify from certain things that were important to you once upon a time.
- You feel a sudden loss or gain of meaning in some or all areas of your life
Suddenly feeling a loss or gain of meaning is a sure sign that you are ready for change and at some level change is already happening within you. You may experience this towards the work you do, the relationships that you have or the value you place on anything. A gain of meaning is easy to associate to change. People don’t see a loss of meaning as a sign for change. But it just means that you are unlearning some ideas and beliefs in turn reduce the value you assign to something in your life. It is still a sign that you are ready for change to happen.
These signs may seem abstract to some people but it is easy to recognise it when it happens to you. Learning new behaviors, thought or emotional patterns requires you to unlearn some old patterns. These changes are slow and gradual. It is important to remember that a change, any change, no matter how life changing, paradigm shifting or transformative, will only happen through change at the smallest, most basic and day to day things. This is the philosophy which is also put to use in our treatment programs at Zorbacare Rehabilitation center, for anxiety, depression, substance dependence and other mental health issues. Whenever someone has to improve a mental health issue, they need to employ a change in lifestyle which permeates their daily routine. Just like how you can’t build a muscle by exercising once a month, you have to do work our daily. In the same way, allowing the change to happen and improve your life also requires daily work. Rehabilitation aims at providing the opportunity and the right conditions for a person to do that. Mental health treatment can only work of you let it work and change you from the most basic areas which slowly progress towards more complex and dynamic systems of one’s mind.