In the present day Mental Health Movement, in which so much content is being made about self help and self improvement, it is very easy for us want to better ourselves constantly. A lot of topics such as stress management, anxiety relief, trauma processing, and so on are being discussed on social media platforms, and people find themselves bombarded with information about these topics. Mental health has become another ‘hustle’, a constant grind to be a better version of ourselves. We may put a lot of pressure on ourselves and forget to actually acknowledge the signs of growth and emotional stability in ourselves. We may end up overintellectualizing our issues and in doing so sometimes lose sight of actual growth in how we manage the most important part of being human: our emotions.
Emotional growth can look very varied, and on a surface level we may not be able to catch it. Sometimes it may also look like old patterns are coming up again, or that we are regressing, but deep unconscious change may be taking place. In this article we aim to outline signs of this emotional growth. Bear in mind, that all the signs mentioned here have to be understood in context of each individual’s life, and may not be an obvious sign for you or a sign of your growth. Nevertheless, let’s explore what can be some markers which may be signs of emotional growth.
1. You are not scared of feeling emotionally overwhelmed
Feeling anxiety, fear, anger, pain, or any unpleasant emotions can come with a desire to run away from the emotion. There may be an underlying fear of what would happen if we really let ourselves feel deeply or get overwhelmed by an emotion. When this fear reduces, we are less scared of feeling our whole range of human emotions. We don’t deny them, we don’t try to escape them. There may still he certain ways in which we suppress emotions, but seeing a visible change in this escapism is a positive sign of emotional growth.
2. You are more open to being vulnerable and expressing your emotions
Instead of being closed up, keeping things bottled up for long and denying anybody access to our vulnerable emotions, you may be more ready to share, to confide in a loved one about your emotions. Sometimes the expression may be healthy, sometimes not. But a conscious intent to want to express and not be bogged down by a fear of judgment, is surely a sign of growth. Vulnerability is a strength, not a sign of weakness. Expressing your feelings takes some amount of emotional regulation, a desire to explore your emotional patterns of triggers and a genuine bid to connect with those around you.
3. You look at conflict as a way to understand yourself and the other
When there is conflict in a close relationship, we are bound to be emotionally triggered by it. We may have too many defenses and end up blaming the conflict on the other, shutting off our feelings, intellectually deciphering the problem without addressing our emotions. A positive change is when we take conflict as a starting point to understand our patterns or those of the other, and how they come together. Conflict is a natural part of human bonds. Instead of running away from it, we can use them as teachers to learn more about ourselves and stay with the difficult feelings that arise.
4. You are aware of how emotions feel in your body
Emotions are a physiological event that clearly shows the mind body connection. Many people ignore this physical feelings and focus on their thoughts or the object of their emotions. For instance, being angry, someone may only be focusing on their angry thoughts, feeding them, or suppressing them, or focusing on the person or situation that made them angry. But anger is also a physical feeling- heat in the upper body, a lump in the throat, a jittery sensation in the chest, etc. and may be different for different people. If you are able to identify this physical aspect and calm the body down, it is a sign of being able to regulate and process your emotions. Not just intellectually, but addressing it at the level of emotion. It is surely a sign of emotional growth.
5. You can identify your emotional needs and ask for support
Being able to tap into what you need, what message is the emotion giving you is vital to emotional stability. For instance, anger may be telling you about an emotional need such as wanting support, loneliness may be telling you to have more meaningful connections, sadness may be telling you to pay attention to your narrative and make some changes, and so on. These are just examples, contextually emotions are indicators of what we need and how we should respond and adapt to our environment. Identifying these needs is crucial in our mental health journey. Sometimes, we need support and help, our emotions can get the better of us. We all need the support and should have the ability to ask for it. Just because we can do it alone, doesn’t mean we have to.
There may be many other signs of emotional growth, many which may not even he conscious or visible on the surface. With an increase in emotional awareness, we may be better able to identify these signs. At ZorbaCare Rehabilitation Center in India, we work with Drug addiction and Alcohol addiction along with other mental health issues that people may be facing. Emotional intelligence is one of our goals for many clients which entails emotional awareness, emotional regulation, processing and emotional expression. Here, our team of mental health professionals works with each client developing a customized therapy plan to suit their unique needs. Emotional growth becomes a vital part of our deaddiction program. After all, well-being is dependent on out ability to feel our feelings fully without coping in destructive ways.